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Saving the Family

"We're on a mission..."

by Aaron Schaub

This story takes place at the very tail end of the Fall Semester of 1995, Finals Week in fact now that I think about it. Prout Table had been in official existence for about a year I think and its members had started to become a little frustrated with each other and stopped talking.

As a disclaimer, I would like to say that it has been a while and some of the details may be a little sketchy or just plain wrong but it is my best recollection. I think that the whole thing began in Room 236 of Darrow Hall where one each Jeremy Morris and Aaron Schaub were living.

Aaron and Jeremy were talking about the recent tensions that seemed to be rising between the members of the Prout Table Collective. Both Jeremy and Aaron were very concerned that their very close and important group of friends might go their separate ways if nothing was done because everyone wasn’t talking. Well, in that little bit of a room in Darrow Hall that was filled with comic books, computer stuff, CD’s, BDU’s and things the color of olive drab Aaron and Jeremy decided that they were going to do something to save the Prout Table Family. They decided to go around to the rooms of all the Prout people and drag the subject that nobody talked about into the light. If memory serves me correctly, I think that it was Justin’s room that we first made our way to seeing as he was in the same building.

Justin agreed that there was, in fact, a problem that no one wanted to talk about and decided to join us in our quest to inform the rest of our friends seeing as the only other thing he had to do was study for finals. Now our merry trio consisting of Jer, Justin, and Schaub took off for Anne’s place and she to agreed but could not join us in our spontaneous visitation of the Prout people because she had to study for a final. The next place that we went was Z and Janet’s place and Z and Janet too thought that we were on to something and decided to join us in our avoidance of study while we save the Prout collective.

It was by this point that our merry band came up with two catch phrases 1) "We’re on a mission." And 2)"Life sucks, get a fucking helmet." The first catch phrase was from the classic Blues Brothers and the second was from the sage Dennis Leary. I’m not sure what brought these catch phrases on but they seemed to sum up our mission quite nicely.

Jeremy's note: I believe that there were two other stops along our quest (that I remember). We went to Stephanie's apartment and then to Founders Hall to get Mike. I seem to remember also picking up Mel and Kacky at some point--or maybe we just stopped by and visited them in Prout.

The last place that we made our way to was Tom’s and Brandt’s. Tom and Brandt thought that we had the right idea and came up with the even better idea that we all go to Brewster’s and celebrate our enlightenment. …And there was much rejoicing.

There was about five of us that wound up going to Brewster’s that night and we stayed there until the bar closed and we were forced to leave. While we were there I remember through the drunken haze that Tom was quite disturbed when an acquaintance of mine decided to use the sink as a urinal. I had seen much worse and wasn’t phased but I was quite amused by Tom’s squeamishness. Another thing that I remember distinctly through the drunken haze of that evening was that the DJ was playing "New York, New York" and Schaub, Tom, Z, Justin, and Janet all did a chorus line out the door. How I miss my college days already.

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Jeremy D. Zawodny / jzawodn@bgnet.bgsu.edu

Updated: March 1st, 1997